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How to deal with jealousy:

Jealous thoughts can be obsessive and controlling. They could completely deprive you of your positivity, mood, confidence, drive you to inappropriate attitudes and hurtful behaviours towards those who are involved, and especially affect your capability to truly accept and be at peace with how you are.


Even realising how damaging jealousy can be, no matter how much we try to suppress or brush away those thoughts, they keep coming back again and again when there is even just a slight trigger.


From observing and contemplating during meditation on some kinds of jealousy, I came to a realisation that the only way to really transcend these thoughts is to shift the perspective!


What do I mean by that?


We often look at someone and start to analyse them, compare ourselves with them, and become completely absorbed in a state of self-pity and aversion towards that person. During this process, we actually look at things through the lens of this “small self” - the ego. We see things as if we are still a little girl or boy wanting to be noticed, chosen, appraised, loved… wanting to have all that attention and outstanding characteristics that the other has.


Shift your outlook from the perspective of this small self - the little girl/boy in you into the perspective of a grown-up, a mother/father, a god/goddess! From this stand-point, you are sure to see that all is perfection! Everyone has their own beauty and goodness! Everyone deserves to be loved and fully experience what they choose for themselves. As a mother/father, god/goddess, you wouldn’t be jealous of your child being more beautiful, more attractive, more successful than you, and you wouldn’t see yourself (the little girl/boy in you) as less lovable than any others.


All of these characters (including yourself) are all beautiful souls, experiencing this life and expressing themselves as unique individuals and at the same time all the same - yearning for joy, freedom, peace, and love. There is no one that is better or worse than any other! Therefore there is nothing and no-one to be jealous about.


Life is a splendid expression of love.


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